before the year ends

how a year can change ~ season, energy, direction:

it teaches you shit:

it SHOULD teach you shit:

I learned that gratitude and grief can exist side by side:

when my heart was shattered, I learned to be grateful for the pain because it means 

I’m alive and I know how to love deeply:

there’s no need to hide from life so I put my self completely into crazy messy hard but honest living:

I can still love the life I live and still ride those waves of emptiness 

navigate past questions that there are no answers to:

the paths I didn’t take and the people that are no longer walking that path with me:

my horse and cart, with my shit and no-one else’s:

the dreams I once had, needn't be abandoned but tweaked:

I've done it before and I can do it again:

remember this ~ we don’t know that the last time we do something is going to be the last:

it can happen unexpectedly or you don’t see it coming because you sweep the signs aside:

the raw truth too hard to face eye to eye so you divert and digress:

inevitably, you can’t avoid the last times but you can love what you have right now ~ more:

the heart can handle so much more that we give it credit for:

it’s far stronger than I realised and while sometimes I wish it didn’t have to be in situations 

where it needed to be strong 

I am truly grateful for it’s beat to remind me that I am still alive

I am still here

and in it’s chambers and ventricles and blood 

in the joy and heartbreak ~ it has known love

it knows love